Addicted
by Magnus Glitter Bane Alec
Summary: Alec is addicted to drugs. Magnus is addicted to sex. And they are both addicted to each other. So this is a story of two addicts. A broken love story. But a true one.
1. Chapter 1

_I'm awesome, aren't I? Look at what I've done. Since you all wanted me to write the Addict's lifetime, I did. But of course what better way to start this then with a bang. So here you go. Magnus's POV. Hope you'll like it._

Everyone has something they are addicted to.

Some have something small, like a TV show. Other's are addicted to drugs or an adrenaline rush, but both are in the end found dead all the same.

I always thought that it's how it should be. After all if you're addicted to something that can and will kill you, chances are you accepted that fact already. So what is the point to dwell on it really? There is no point to getting upset because someone got what they wanted.

That's what I used to think. But things always change. And somehow I changed. And the one who changed me surely doesn't deserve to die. He shouldn't want to. And yet he does.

He told me so a few times.

When you're addicted you need to get your hit. You need to do whatever to make yourself feel that rush that you need. That high.

My high is sex. It always was. I accepted it. I have no problems with it. Nothing is wrong with getting someone to your bed every few days. At least it wasn't. Until I met him. Until I met Alec.

He caught my eye right away. Blue eyes and black hair were always my favorite after all. I saw him and I used him. Like I always do. I used him to get my high but I gave him his in return too. Drug addicts were always the easiest to draw it. Just give them what they want and they'll do anything.

I used him that time but, unlike others, couldn't get him out of my head in the days that followed. So when he called a week later it wasn't about using him anymore. It was about him. And that scared me.

Every time he called afterwards the high of sex wasn't as important anymore. Not as important as the high of him. I said nothing though. I said nothing and kept giving him the drugs every time he came over. Because he needed them, and I understood that. The fact that I understood, however, didn't mean that I kept giving him the same dosage. No. I found myself giving him smaller and smaller doses with every meeting. And he didn't seem to notice so it was okay.

Drug addicts die. I knew that. But this one…I didn't want this one to. I didn't want to lose Alec and I knew that I'll never want to either.

For someone who was never depended on people, who only ever used people, it was a shock to fall in love with him. But also, I found myself thinking that it was also inevitable. Because it was Alec. It was the boy who didn't always go right after. It was the boy who stayed just a little bit longer. And unlike the others, it was the boy who talked. He talked to me and it was a first but it felt nice. It felt nice to get to know him more. To let him get to know me. Because he listened. And no one did that for me before. I was always on my own. Always alone with no one who cared but Alec seemed to. For some reason he seemed to care. So that was why I found myself asking him to stay even just a few minutes longer. And he did. He always did.

Everyone is addicted to something. I'm addicted to sex. But I'm also, I found myself thinking sometimes, I'm addicted to Alec. I'm addicted to his blue eyes and soft lips. I'm addicted to his voice and how it carries when he laughs. I'm addicted to how he thinks, and talks and listens. I'm just addicted to him because he cares. Because he's Alec.

And Alec…Alec is addicted to drugs.

He told me about his family on the nights he stayed. He told me about how all he wants to do is die most of the time. He told me that if he ever got a chance he was scared that he will. And that he will leave his siblings behind. He didn't want to at that moment; he said. But he was scared he will one day. That his parents will push him too far one day.

So when I got a call from Alec's phone but with a completely other voice on the other side telling me that Alec is in the hospital, it scared me to death. Because he isn't allowed to do that. He isn't allowed to die. To leave me. He can't.

Drug addicts die and they may be okay with that, but I'm not. I'm not okay with him dying. I will never be.

That was yesterday.

I rushed to the hospital then and when I saw him barely alive but luckily still breathing, all caution was thrown into the wind. There is no point in pretending I'm just using him. Not anymore. There never really was in the first place but it's easier like that. It's easier to pretend then to face the truth.

So when I walked into the hospital room and heard his parents kicked him out I told him to come live with me without hesitation. I said that I love him because I do. He made me fall in love with him in just a few days and I haven't stopped falling since.

He said nothing then and I found myself getting scared. Scared that maybe he doesn't feel the same. That maybe he doesn't want to try whatever messed up thing that is between us. But then we were alone. And he said the words I was too scared to for so long.

As he said 'I love you too' right before falling asleep, hand still in mine, I smiled.

Because we may both be messed up and addicted to things we shouldn't. But we have each other. And maybe we'll make it. Maybe we will get our love story after all.

Broken and messed up but ours.

He's a drug addict and I'm a sex addict. But that's okay. We have each other to get us through. So it's okay. It will be okay.

_Did you like it? Tell me what you think._

_Hope this wasn't as bad as I think it is. But anyway, here is the beginning of their own chaptered fanfic. It will be Alec's POV mostly and it won't be that long but I'll try to make it good, I promise. So I hope you liked this._

_Please review my lovelies and don't forget to subscribe too._


	2. Chapter 2

_The second chapter is finally here. I hope I did it good and you'll like it. Also I forgot to write this last time but this is kind of a sequel to 'You And I' so if you're a new reader you may get confused later on even though I tried to brush up on everything as much as I could in the first chapter. So anyway read that if you haven't thanks. But for now here you go, hope you like it._

I hate this. Every day I spend in here is hell. I need my hit. I need something right now. I can't do this. I can t stop and I can't. I just can't.

My mind was a mess as I kept shaking on the bed. My bed for the past week and for who knows how long more. A week without anything was killing me though. I can't even get up anymore. I need it so bad. I can't even breathe anymore. I need my hit. I can't do this. I can't stop I can't. It hurts too much. So so much. I haven't slept in so long and I need my damn hit.

I wanted to scream and trash and throw everything around me in frustration but all I can do is shake because I can't do that. I need to stop. I knew that. I know I need to stop. I need to stop for my siblings and Magnus. I need to stop for myself. I know that. But it's too much. It hurts too much to stop. I can't.

Yanking at my hair and biting at my lip I made myself sit still. I need to stop this. Stop myself. I need to keep trying so I can show them I'm not as much of a failure they think I am. I need to show everyone that I'm worth it because maybe then I will finally believe it too.

"Alec?" A familiar voice cut through my thoughts and I looked up to see gold and green eyes that were the only thing keeping me sane most days here. I could see it everything in his eyes when I looked. The pity but somehow also fondness. It was a shock to see fondness in those eyes directed to me. Especially after knowing how much of a mess I look at the moment. Pale, wide eyed and skinnier then I ever was because I can't keep anything down anymore so I just stopped trying. I looked even worse than I did when we first met and I knew it. So seeing fondness in those eyes wasn't something I expected.

"Magnus. How did you get here? I thought I wasn't allowed visitors." I asked, voice scratchy and shaky from the fact that I haven't been using it in a few days. There is no point. No point in anything. My parents made sure of that. Their last surprise present to me was the fact that I was submitted into rehab where no one can visit me so it was even worse then I could ever imagine. I was left completely alone in this. So why is Magnus here then? How?

"Persistence darling. A lot of persistence." Magnus said, closing the door behind him before walking up to me and sitting on the edge of the bed. "I wanted to make sure you're okay." He cherished my cheek and I couldn't help but lean into the touch. It felt nice. "Plus they decided it would maybe be a good idea for me to come here since you're not eating anything."

"I can't." I said, hoping he will understand that not eating wasn't on purpose. "I can't eat anything. I can't keep it down."

Magnus sighed at hearing that but only mumbled an 'I thought so'. Not saying a word to me as he reached for the plate of food that has been next to my bed since this morning. Untouched.

"I can help." He said suddenly, placing the plate in his lap. The words were not something I expected but they still made me look up. How can he help? Before I could even ask the question I got an answer with him reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pill. A small pill that became the center of my world the second my eyes zeroed out on it. I need it. "It's nothing strong but it may still help. And you only get the one." He said and made me look at him again with the hand that was still on my cheek. I did so somewhat reluctantly. "I will give you one more next time I come and I'll try to do so soon. I still need you to get better but I'll try to make it easier for you because I saw how much getting clean can mess with people. So we will take this slow okay? Slow."

I nodded and he bended down to leave a kiss on my lips. It was only a brush of lips and it didn't last long but I still found myself trailing after when he pulled away. Magnus just smiled and brought the pill to my lips. "Open up now."

I took the pill almost greedily and it didn't take long for the affects to take effect and I felt relaxed for the first time in so long. After being left dry for so long even this little felt like heaven. By the time the pill took effect I was already half through the coup that was still on Magnus's lap because he decided to leave nothing to chance and feed me myself.

If it was anyone else I would have protested. Wouldn't want to be seen as so weak and helpless. But this is Magnus. Magnus who has seen me at my worst and still stayed. Magnus who said he loves me and smuggled drugs for me into rehab. This was Magnus. So it was okay. Everything will be okay somehow. It will. Maybe I can't do this but I can continue trying. It's the best I can do.

For Magnus.

For my Jace and Izzy.

For myself.

_Did you like it? Tell me what you think._

_My baby is in pain but Magnus is here to make it all better. I really hope I did good here and you liked it. Please tell me what you think below and I'll try to post soon again._

_So anyway review my lovelies._


	3. Chapter 3

_Hi...I'm sorry for not posting anything lately but I was at the countryside with no internet. Also I didn't write at all there because I finally got sims installed again and by the angel how much I missed sims. So yea I know that it's not the best excuse in the world so sorry for the wait._

_Also I don't think I remembered to mention this before but all the You And I "sequels" won't have a bigger chapter count then You And I. So no more than five chapters on this and Put Me Back Together since Where We Left Off may have a bit more. Anyway I just wanted you to know that and now on with the chapter. Hope you like it._

_Warning! This contains sex of the boyxboy kind._

"_When did you get the tattoo done?" Magnus's voice reached my half asleep and hazy mind as he followed the lines that were inked onto my shoulder blade and down my back with a soft touch. The touch that made me so relaxed ever if the drugs weren't in my system yet. Somehow through the past month I found myself thinking that he is as good as a drug sometimes. Always managing to get me relaxed and at ease even by just talking. It was a nice feeling. But still I pushed the thoughts of I love you's down like I always do before I answered in a slightly sleepy voice. "At fifteen. I don't remember it though."_

_Magnus chuckled at hearing the answer, his breath hitting my bare skin and sending a shiver down my spine. "How high were you?"_

"_Pretty high." I answered with a smile of my own. I always love how he never judges me for how I am and what I do. He just accepts me fully and that's something not even my siblings can do._

_A finger that was trailing over my tattoo moved lower as his other hand moved to my chest, making the relaxed atmosphere change just like that as I was turned around and he was on top of me again, lips already on mine in a kiss that I returned eagerly._

_As we pulled apart and his lips moved lower to my neck to make yet another hickey in a row of many I couldn't help but laugh. "Round two?"_

"_What do you think?" He asked, breathing against my neck as he trailed kisses down to my collar bone and I couldn't already feel his growing erection against my thigh. That was an answer enough._

Everything was hazy as I opened my eyes and the room felt hotter than it did when I closed them. It couldn't have only been my delirious mind though. I knew that I definitely had another flashback just now. They've been happening more and more lately as my mind turned to the worst. It was so much worse this time then the last because I have never gotten that high before as I did when I tried to kill myself. Plus I'm alone here so it's hard to even muster the will to do it because there is no point. Why would I stop something that makes the pain go away?

But I can't give up. And my mind no matter how delirious is somehow making sure of that. Making me have flashbacks and remember Magnus. Always Magnus. It has been only three weeks and I want to give up so bad but then there is Magnus and I can't because he wants me to get better. Because he cares. Because he loves me.

At least that's what he says. And I'm trying to believe him I really am but it's hard. It's hard because it's me and I'm a mess. I'm not worth him caring. And yet he comes to visit me every few days, every time bringing me something to make me feel that high that I need so much. The high that he needs too.

That one thought is what keeps me up most nights. The thought of what he's doing at night while I'm tossing and turning. Because I am not the only addict here, I am not the only one who needs his hit. And even though we are kind of in a relationship now I can't blame him if he goes in search of what he needs because I can't help him. Because I'm here and he's there. He said he hasn't been with anyone since we started sleeping together and I could see the honesty in his eyes as he said it. But now…I doubt that's true anymore. I have been in here for too long for him to not call up someone else. To get his own hit that he needs.

And I know I shouldn't blame him. It's my own fault I'm here and he can't help it. It's his own addiction and I would be a hypocrite if I told him he can't, if I got mad because I know how it is to need it. Need the hit so bad it physically hurts. So I'm trying to make myself accept it. But still I know it will hurt like hell when he comes in here and says he slept with someone else. Because I know he will. And I know he'll tell me, he wouldn't find something like that from me.

He should be here already though. He usually is. By now he is already trying to feed me until one of us finally gives in and it's either me eating on my own or him feeding me like he intended to. That's usually. But he's not here yet. And all I could feel was fear because don't want to lose him. He is the first person that I am not related to that actually cares. I don't want to lose him.

I was just about to will myself back to sleep to stop my rapid thought when the door opened and I couldn't finally see the person I have been waiting for. But what I saw didn't put my mind at ease at all.

Magnus was a mess. Something I have never seen him look before. But it was true. His hair was rustled and sticking in every direction, with clothes crinkled and eyes slightly wild as they fell on mine. He slightly reminded me on me at that moment. On me when I'm having withdrawal… My mind sparked with a tiny bit of hope but I didn't even get a time to open my mouth to speak before a sound of the lock on the door clicked and he was by me almost immediately. Lips claiming mine in desperation so hard it drew blood and arms moving around me to hold me closer. One arm moving to my ass and making me moan, what just riled him up more.

My lungs were screaming for air until I had to literally push him off of me so he finally breaks the kiss and let's go, leaving us both panting and just staring at each other for a second before he broke the silence, shifting so his body isn't on top of mine anymore.

"I'm sorry, I just…I know you're not the best right now but fuck I almost cheated on you yesterday and I can't do that. I refuse to do that. But I just…God I feel like I'm losing my mind." He was staring at the floor rather than me as he talked, desperation but somehow also shame evident in his voice. That along with his words took me by surprise. He hasn't slept with anyone? Three weeks and he didn't get his hit. I wouldn't have believed it if I couldn't see it for myself. Because I could see the desperation and hear the honesty. And it didn't take much more for me to finally fully believe that he cares. Because if anything this definitely proves that he does. He really cares.

"I'm not going to break you know." The words left my lips without me even meaning to but they were true. I don't mind us having sex here. It wouldn't actually be good for me too because I need to get my mind off of the pain and desperation I was feeling myself. As he heard the words Magnus looked up at me again in surprise but with hope in his eyes. Hope that was surely mirroring the one I had just a few moments before. He didn't move though so it was me who grabbed his shirt and pulled him close for another kiss that was a little slower this time. A little sweeter.

But he got to his senses soon enough, deepening the kiss by passing a tongue over my lips, asking for entrance that I granted without a thought. It was a routine that I knew all too well. And one that I was more than willing to let into. To let into Magnus.

After that it all moved pretty fast, wondering hands passed down my back, to my thigh and finally knee. Clothes weren't a problem soon enough as he got rid of mine quickly and I in turn did the same. I could see how impatient he was getting, how desperate as his kisses tuned bruising again. But I didn't mind. If anything it actually felt nice. But then again this was Magnus. It always felt nice. His hands kept wondering and making me moan as he passed over all the right places. I could feel him smile against my neck as it was covered by more than just a few marks that will stay there for a while.

Eventually we had to break apart though as he quickly scrambled back for his pants to grab lube and a condom that he always caries around. But as he got back to me I could see that it wasn't the only thing he got. Because as he kissed me I could feel him passing something with his tongue past my lips and I couldn't have been happier as I noticed that it was a pill. Such a sweet little thing.

I showed my thanks by wrapping my hand over his erection and making him moan and gasp against my lips in return, all the while bucking down his hips to get more friction. I couldn't keep it up for long though because I barely had time to swallow my pill before he was already pushing one lubed finger in, making me the one moaning this time.

And just like that soon I was a moaning mess as one finger turned into two and he found that bundle of nerves that made me feel stars. Lips never moving from mine all the while. It was like he was trying to get as much of me as he could. He probably was. It has been three weeks after all.

We didn't manage to get to three fingers though, he was getting to impationate and I could see that so I made him stop by grabbing onto his hand and he understood without a word because only a few seconds later something far bigger than two fingers was pushed inside of me by one clean thrust. I could feel the pain cursing through my body as it did because the prep was far from enough and tears appeared at the corners of my eyes but Magnus was there to kiss them away as he waited, ignoring how desperate he was so he doesn't hurt me.

It was that thought and the love I could see through the dark lust of his gold and green eyes that made me take a deep breath and whisper 'go'. And he did. Staring off slow until neither of us could take it anymore and his thrusts became deep and hard, finding that right spot and making us both lose our minds from the pleasure. We didn't last long through as I knew we wouldn't and both came only a few seconds apart. But the next round was longer. And the one after that.

"You really didn't sleep with anyone else even though I'm here?" I couldn't help but ask as the two of us lied on the too small bed with my head on his chest and mind already half asleep.

"No I didn't." Magnus answered, combing his fingers through my hair as his other hand moved soothingly up and down my back. We were both too relaxed to move. "I told you I love you Alexander. I would never do that to you. I could never."

"I love you too." I answered before yawning, the mix of the past few hours and the high that was still building up so perfect I never wanted it to end because I was just so relaxed.

"I know you do. Now sleep Alexander. Sweet dreams." I could hear him going to dreamland too as he spoke and it made me smile. It was nice to fall asleep like this. I could get used to it.

"Sweet dreams." And they were. For the first time in a long time.

_Did you like it? Tell me what you think._

_Sorry for the wait again but look lemon. Only two more chapters here right? I'm sorry if you wanted more than that but I never really saw it having more chapters. Oh and I'll try updating all the other You And I thingies soon too to make up for the wait. Sadly All Fall Down will have to wait. Again._


	4. Chapter 4

_Okay this is gonna be short and also the last chapter. Sorry. I just have to finish off all the stories, plus I forgot what I wanted to do in the end but I kinda like it like this. It's cute. Anyway, here you go. Hope you like it._

Mornings.

I always hated them. Every morning meant yet another shitty day is in front of me. A day that more then not ends up with me getting high in order to forget it.

That's at least how it was before. And now…now I love mornings the most.

My mind slowly got back to consciousness, making me open my eyes to a dark room. A room I was so familiar with by now because I've been sleeping in it for three months now. It's funny how fast time is moving. It never moved this fast before.

"Stop thinking and go back to sleep." A voice grumbled. A voice that made me love the morning for the first time in a long time. A person I just loved waking up next to. "It's too early to be awake."

"The only reason why it looks like it's early is because the blinds are shut." I countered but still didn't even try to get up or even look at what time it really is. It doesn't matter either way because there is no way I am getting up yet. The bed is too warm and soft.

"It's always too early." Magnus replied making me smile and turn around to face him, getting one of his eyes to open before he just pulled me close and went back to trying to sleep, with me not even trying to argue because after three months of living with him it really is always too early. Especially if you went four rounds the night before and feel asleep only at around three.

So in conclusion; it's too fucking early.

…

I have always loved Magnus's loft. It's a mess true, but you somehow still always know where everything is.

After I was let out of rehab like promised it was him who took me in, into a loft that has been feeling more and more like home every time I was there and now it really is. There is just one thing about it that is frustrating.

The medicine cabinet.

Or to put it more precisely the lock that is on the medicine cabinet.

It seems that Magnus decided to keep me away from any drugs after I was finally able to get out of that awful place.

It's not like I'm taking anything or even thinking about it, because I'm not. I haven't taken anything since he stopped sneaking me in pills two and a half months into rehab. It's just that it's really frustrating when my head hurts and I need a pill because I need to make him get it.

But I understand. I get it. I wouldn't trust myself either. To be honestly I'm sort of relived in a way and just happy that he cares enough. That he loves me enough to take care of me and make sure I don't stray to my old habits again. I did just get out of rehab after all.

My siblings were really happy to see me when I did too but we kind of don't see each other that much lately since my parents decided to try and get the contact to a minimum. They're failing of course, there is Jace after all, it's still annoying though.

But yea when I think about it all I could have never imagined my life to be like this. To be clean and live with someone I love and who loves me…I definitely did not expect to have a sex addict for a boyfriend but that is the thing I mind the least really.

It would have been nice if he could keep his hands to himself in public though but he doesn't seem to be able to. But again, if I go and think about it, I don't mind it that much.

It is Magnus after all.

It's Magnus whose addiction am I.

But I also have a new addiction.

It's him.

And honestly, being addicted to each other isn't bad because if it's the two of us…

It is the best addiction there is.

_Did you like it? Tell me what you think._

_Short but sweet. Think of it as an epilogue. But anyway now that it's officially done, what did you think of this? The story and the chapter. Please review below because I live off of those. _

_So please review my lovelies._


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